My street has one very unpredictable madwoman who probably deserves her own district even. This particular woman has completely taken ownership of the road near my home. I do not mean legally, of course, but practically. She throws stones when she feel like it, pours water on people without warning, lights small fires in the middle of the road like she is conducting some kind of roadside ritual, and often places all manner of random things in the middle of the road.
To pass where she has camped one has to first assess the mood of the morning. Is she peaceful today? Is she angry? Please note, when she is angry she yells, throws insults and is violent.
I am very afraid of her. Usually when I pass that stretch, I am running. I run fast enough to look like I know what I am doing, but also slow enough simply to survive, seeing I am not the fittest of people.
On this particular day, however, I was walking, and that is how she noticed me. She looked at me and said, in Luganda, almost like an old neighbour who had been observing my habits for years:
"Eh, today you are walking."
I stopped.
"Wanji?" "I beg your pardon", I said.
She continued in rapid Luganda in such a way that could not be interrupted or questioned.
"Every day I see you running but today you are walking. That is good. When you run, things chase you. Dogs chase you. Ghosts chase you. People chase you. Bad things chase people who run. Walk. You can even fall down and break yourself."
I was in deep shock. What The....!! I froze in a moment where I do not know whether I was receiving madness, philosophy, or an early morning TED Talk from an unexpected speaker, so I simply nodded and said, “Okay... I will walk" because honestly, what is the correct counterargument to ghosts?
She continued walking beside me. My peace began to leave my body - that ghost that she was talking about.
She had now entered a second speech, this time addressed partly to me, partly to herself, perhaps also partly to people only she could hear. She was saying something along the lines of refusing to go back to where she came from and that nobody would force her. That she had decided and that was final.
No. I did not engage her further. I did not ask where she came from, nor who was forcing her. I focused on walking.
I increased my pace slightly.
She increased hers too.
I increased again.
She matched me exactly.
At that point, I began calculating all possible outcomes. If she suddenly throws a stone, do I duck or sprint? If she pulls out something sharp, do I scream? If she decides we are now exercise buddies for life, what is my long-term plan?
Meanwhile she kept talking, very calmly, as if we were two old friends out for an early morning walk.
Suddenly, without warning, she stopped, bent down, and began collecting sticks from the roadside, pulling leaves off those that had.
That was my release. Phew
I continued walking alone, but now with fresh respect because in that situation, she had observed something correctly: I do run every day, particularly around her spot, and she had noticed. She had stored the information and had even surprisingly developed a theory around it. Maybe she observes more than people assume.
To be honest, one statement that she made got me thinking...
When you run, things chase you.... A wild sentence but when you think about it, it is not entirely wrong.
From where my feet are, advice comes from the least expected places. It may appear barefoot, carrying sticks, capable of throwing stones, smelly and waring you of ghosts. You just have to be paying attention. Out of the mouths of babes madwomen...
Sometimes the deepest truths come from the most unexpected messengers, and there is something to learn from everyone.
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